Hopeful

We were planning on waiting a little bit longer before we announced our big news, but my friend accidentally let the cat out of the bag on Saturday night to people around here and I have been getting some questions. Haha.  It's okay Jen, we still love you!

We are expecting baby #3!

 Due July 2013:)

Most of you know the history of my pregnancies and our babies, as well as the history of our losses, which is why we chose to not tell everyone for a little while, at least until our chances of loss significantly dropped.



On Friday the 14th we had our first OB appointment where we found out everything was going as it should be.  We got to see our precious baby via ultrasound (it was the kind the DR just wheels in, so it was not great quality) and we saw her/him moving around like crazy and a beautiful strong heartbeat.  Obviously we are not out of the woods yet (you never really are) but the chances of this baby staying get better everyday.  We had considered possibly announcing our news this day....but after Friday's horrible tragedy, we knew it wasn't the right time.

Things are going as expected so far.  For me, being miserable is a good sign....which is what I am currently experiencing.  With the girls I had pretty much every negative symptom and side effect of pregnancy possible.  (With all of my miscarriages, had very little pregnancy symptoms).  So far, this pregnancy is lining up with my pregnancy with the girls, which includes all day sickness, vomitting, large amounts of stomach acid (what I eat or drink does not make a difference), acid reflux, and extreme tiredness (as well as some other issues that are too embarrassing to mention).  And to top it all off, it is still continuing to get worse by the day, even as I near the end of the first trimester.  As much as it all sucks, it is all a good sign that baby is still there. (And yes, I am on medications for the nausea and the reflux...they help some!)

We have a long road ahead of us still and we are trying to look forward and not back.

And just to be clear...we told VERY FEW people.  Seriously, very few.  If you were not one of the few that knew, please do not take it personally.

Along with not telling people, I have definitely pulled away from most people since our loss in early September, so I have been keeping more to myself. Some of it is on purpose, but most of it is, what I think, my own mind's way of coping. This is totally not like me.  Anyone who knows me, knows that I am a very social person.  But looking back, I know I did the same thing when we almost lost Jordyn at birth.  I avoided phone calls from family even.  I was too much of an emotional wreck to see or speak to anyone.  If I am not around people, I don't have to worry about talking about things I do not want to talk about at that time, and things can be more on my terms.  There are very few people that I feel comfortable enough to just let everything out.  These people accept me for who I am, and know exactly what I need, when I need it.  I can say whatever I need to say, no matter who stupid, whiny, or selfish it sounds, and I know that I am not being judged and they will still love me and show me compassion just the same.  They know that is not who I am, and it's probably crazy hormones talking. These people know who they are and how much they mean to me.

With that said, I am so blessed with so many people who love and care about me and my family, ...near and far, and we feel blessed to have all of you in our lives.  We appreciate your love and prayers, especially these last few months.

Minot Fall

We are so excited that fall is in full swing up here in Minot.  It looks like we are going to have pretty, but cold fall.  We love fall almost as much as we love Christmas.   We find all sorts of fun stuff to do around here.  For those that say Minot has nothing to offer, you are SO wrong.  People are always asking how we find so much to do...I am not sure exactly how, but we just look for fun things around the area.  But I decided to compile a list of what we have found when it comes to fall. These are just the things that we have found along with a short review for each one.  They all have websites you can check out if you google them. They are all very affordable for fun, family events, most of them costing less than $20 for a family of four.  We enjoy doing all these fun fall festivities when it just starts getting colder out, usually in early October, before it's freezing.  We want it to feel like fall and wear cute fall outfits, but not freeze our butts off.

Stuff to do:

Papa's Pumpkin Patch   Bismarck, ND

Max Corn Maze  Just south of Minot, ND

Berry Acres Farm  Minot, ND

Angelic Gardens  Minot, ND

Papas Pumpkin Patch.  Even though this is a 2 hour drive, we have gone a couple of the years we have been here.  It's a huge pumpkin patch with lots to do for kids of all ages.  It's really pretty and has lots of good photo ops!  Weekdays are quiet, but there isn't as many things to do there.  Weekends are crazy busy but they have the most activities and stuff to do going.  We probably won't make the trip out of this again.

Max Corn Maze.  We have only been to this once because we just found out about it last year.  It only takes a few minutes to get to from town.  It's pretty basic....there is only a corn maize, but it takes at least an hour to get through with kids.  The girls have fun getting lost in there and we pretty much let them decide where to go until everyone starts getting tired and then we help.  When we went they had a small concession stand, some hay bales to play on, and a little barrel train for younger kids.  It's a fundraiser for the FFA so the money goes to help support that program.  Planning on going here again this year.

Berry Acres Farm.  We have only been here once as well, a few years ago when the base chapel had a family day here.  Last year it flooded pretty bad, and this year they opened back up.  It has a cute little store that sells produce and homemade goods such as breads, treats, and jams.  Outside they have lots of pumpkins and a smallish corn maize.  It's good for something close by.  Probably going to check it out again now that it's open.

Angelic Gardens.  We found this place last year.  We organized a "family night" where we got a few other close families together and all went together.  They have a nice garden area, and a pumpkin patch where you can actually go pick the pumpkins.  Their prices are amazing on pumpkins too.  You can do a group reservation and do a hayride around the farm areas and then come back to a bonfire with hot drinks and treats.  We loved it because we were the only ones there, because it's pretty much by reservation only unless you are just picking veggies.  The kids could run and have fun with no worry of getting lost (it's not huge so you can see everything).  We are doing this again this year.

On top of all of this stuff, there is lots going on when it comes to Halloween too:

Base Trick or treating night

Trick or treating at the base clinic

(perfect for all ages, inside and warm!)

Downtown Pumpkin Walk

(For preschool and younger, it's during school hours. Downtown businesses hand out candy inside their 

stores. Jordyn loved this the last few years)

The pain and the joy

ugh...I do not even know where to begin.  This post has been a long time coming, and it has changed a few times along the way before I finally decided to actually publish it. It started out as something completely different than it is now.  This is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.  This is pretty big, and not many people know about any of this.  Just family and very CLOSE friends.  I am sorry if you didn't know, but we chose to keep this information private for many reasons, because it is very personal, and well, it's our choice :) 

Have you ever wanted something so bad that it physically hurts?  Like EVERYWHERE?  Your heart mostly, but also your actual body as well.  That is what I felt for the last 5 years.  And the pain has increasingly gotten worse and worse.  I thought eventually it would fade, but no, it continues to worsen.  I feel like a part of me is missing.  Not necessarily that I am incomplete, but that part of me missed something.  I am sure that doesn't make sense to most of you, but that is the only way I know how to describe it. So here goes....

I.WANT.MORE.BABIES.

I know, this isn't a shock to anyone. But it's more real than most people know.

As most of you know we have two BEAUTIFUL miracle babies.  We know how blessed we are to have these girls and we thank God for them every single day.  We had a very long, bumpy journey when it came to bringing both of them home.  8 weeks combined NICU time. I am not going to lie....it SUCKED. BIG TIME.  I would never wish having a NICU baby on anyone.  Because two out of two babies I gave birth to had medical issues at birth, we decided almost instantly after Jordyn was born that we needed to be done. No more babies.  The thought of this broke my heart into a million pieces, as I have always wanted a BIG family.... but my head rationalized it was what needed to be done.  Pretty much right away, I regretted this decision.  And the older the girls got, the more I felt I was missing a part of me.  A mommy part of me that I missed out on.

About 8 months ago  I finally realized the pain of NOT having more babies was far worse than would COULD happen if we did have more.  Geoff knew I always wanted more, and he did too, but one day, I finally told Geoff how I had been feeling, and how this feeling wouldn't go away...I tried.  It just wouldn't.  Within a couple of days we decided to do something about it, started researching and making phone calls and do what needed to be done in order for us to start trying to have at least one more baby. It WAS possible.  I needed to at least try...and if it didn't happen, then it wasn't meant to be.  But I couldn't fathom living the rest of my life with regret and thinking What IF? 

The fear set in.  The fear of all the things that could possibly go wrong.  Before Abbygail, I went through two miscarriages.  The first one, I was almost 11 weeks, and the 2nd one, I was about 6 weeks.  And then we had our perfect Abby.  I had a horrible pregnancy....so sick I had to go into the hospital a few times to get hydrated.  Yes, I am one of those lucky people who has "morning" sickness 24/7 from the beginning until a few days after the baby is born.  Born at 34 weeks and 4lbs, she was this tiny, perfect baby.  She was in the NICU for 6 weeks, 6 LONG weeks for prematurity reasons.  Two years later, our precious Jordyn joined our family at almost 2 weeks past my due date.  She got stuck in my birth canal and was taken emergency c-section.  She was born not breathing and full life saving measures were used to bring her back.  She was born with an APGAR score of 1.  If you know anything about the APGAR scoring, you know that is BAD.  It was probably the most terrifying moment in my life, hearing them working on her, trying to bring her back to life. She suffered some major brain injuries and all sorts of complications.  The first few days, we didn't even know if she was going to make it, but  she made it home with us after only 2 weeks in the NICU!  So most people understood when we said we were DONE. 

 I felt like I was robbed of both of my babies first few weeks of life, that most people will never understand, so I will try to describe it:

I have never had a baby instantly handed to me after being born

I have never had a baby in my hospital room with me.

I have never been able to nurse my babies within the first 48 hours even.  There were always so.many.tubes.

My phone calls to family after birth were always filled with tears of sadness, not tears of joy like most new moms.  Those phone calls SUCKED, and I made my mom and Geoff do most of them.

When visitors came to see me in the hospital, they always walked on eggshells...not there to sit and hold a brand new baby, but to sit and pray with me that I would bring my babies home.

I had to ask to hold MY own babies.

I didn't get to hold Jordyn til she was 4 days old.

I had to "scrub in" every time I wanted to even go look at my babies.

I had to feed my babies when I was told...no more, no less.

I had to see my babies with a million wires and tubes coming out of them everyday.

I had to tell my very excited two year old that her baby sister was very sick and wasn't coming home with us.

Telling her that was one of THE hardest things I have EVER had to do.

I had to leave my babies every night.

I had to be alone as soon as both girls came home, because Geoff had to use all of his leave and then some when they were in the NICU.  He had to go back to work right away.  My mom's plane tickets expired before either of them came home, and had to leave while they were both still in the NICU.

And on top of all of this, I have such tainted views of pregnancy and the horrible things that can happen at any given moment.  Living in fear that I could lose the baby every single day.  That fear ruins almost any of the joy.

But even the worst of times can be forgotten when there is so much joy from what came of it.  That pain gets put on a back burner and seems so minuscule when you take a step back and look at what is really important.  Our girls are worth every second and more of the pain we had to go through to have them in our lives.  I would do it again in a heartbeat if I had to.

In April we took a big step in order to start trying again....Geoff had his vasectomy reversed (This is probably TMI for some of you, but oh well, I figure you care enough to still be reading this at this point).  The surgery went very well....and....

Well somehow, we managed to get pregnant in only 3 months!  3 months!!!!  The average time for couples in our situation is 12 months or more, so we were completely shocked.  To me, 3 months seemed like forever as it was longer than the other 4 times we were trying.  It seemed too good to be true.  Right around this time we found out we got orders to Colorado Springs for next summer, our first choice of assignments.  There was just so much awesomness going on. But that fear.  The fear of knowing how easily something could go wrong.  It makes it so I can't even enjoy being pregnant, at all for the most part. I so wish it wasn't there.  But it is, and it always will be.  I would give anything to not have it. To not know all that I know.

When most people find out they are expecting, they are over joyed with the thought of bringing home a baby in 9 months.  They broadcast to the world their good news.  But with me, that isn't the case.  I know that there is a chance I WONT be bringing a baby home in 9 months, or at all.  It hurts, and I hate it.  It makes it hard to be excited, because I feel like as soon as I get excited, something will go wrong.  We were completely thrilled that we were expecting, and prayed that everything would go smoothly this time.

A couple weeks later, things came crashing down. We found out we lost the baby at almost 7 weeks after a trip to the ER.  We thought this time would be different.  I was having lots of pregnancy symptoms which we took as a good sign. We figured we had two healthy pregnancies since my two miscarriages, and that we were going to be okay.  We had hope  But God has a different plan for that baby.  He or she is in heaven with his or her two siblings experiencing joy that we can't even imagine.  And I can't wait for the day that I finally get to meet them.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

The emotional and physical pain of a miscarriage  SUCKS.  And, it doesn't get easier each time.  If anything it gets harder, because you start to a little lose hope each time.  You start to wonder how many more times is this going to happen before I get the joy? I hate admitting to that.  I think this time might have been the most emotionally painful one for me.  Not exactly sure why.  There are no words that can take that pain away.  We know it happened for a reason.  We know this wasn't the right time.  We know all of the stuff that people trying to help tell us.  It doesn't help, and it doesn't make the pain less.  That is the main reason I chose to not talk about this with anyone.  People have good intentions, but don't realize it's not helping in any way.

It brings so many questions of WHY?  Why did this happen to me again?  Why am I the ONLY one in my family to not only go through miscarriage, but also a premature baby, NICUs, emergency c-sections, babies needing emergency living saving treatments,  and traumatic births?  Everyone else in my family (and most of my close friends even) have never had to deal with any of those things...so why have I had to go through ALL of them? WHY? I will never know the answer to this, so I have to just trust that God has a bigger plan than what I can see.  There is a reason why we have been through all of this, we just don't know why, except that so far, he has given us two precious gifts on this earth, and now 3 in heaven.  If dealing with this pain is what I have to do to bring us another amazing child to our family, then that is what I will do.  I pray for trust.  I NEED to trust in HIM if this is ever going to happen.  I need more trust and hope that he has this amazing plan for our family. 

We do not know exactly what lies ahead.  We pray that it is in God's will for us to bring another miracle into this world....maybe this time a healthy one that comes home with us right away!

The fact that we DID get pregnant gives us so much hope.  So much.  We know now that it is possible, and we might be blessed with another baby (or babies).  And what we have right now, these two amazing girls, is more than enough.  Geoff is the most amazing husband I could ask for, and my girls....they bring me more joy than I ever thought possible on this earth.  I am so incredibly blessed.  

Please know, I did not write this because I want people to feel sorry for me.  I don't want that at all. I decided to lay it all out and write this because I NEED prayer....and support.  I need the strength to not give up. We have been through to much to give up.

Like Clay

Like clay in the potter's hands
Mold me, mold me
Like a child in her father's arms
Hold me, hold me
Like a sparrow afraid to fly
Raise me, raise me
This is just between You and I
I love You, I love You 

Let this song be an offering of my love for You
I lay myself down upon Your throne
For whatever You want me to do 

For whatever it takes
And whatever the faith
I trust You
For whatever the cost
And whatever is lost
I love You
I love You, Lord 

Let my life be an example of Your love for me
I give this world just to carry Your cross
And to be what You want me to be 

If we call out Your name
We should see our face
If we sacrifice our lives
We will see that grace 

Back To School 2012

For being a photographer, I am pretty bad sometimes about taking photos of my family and our daily life.  I realize that sometimes I go weeks without touching my camera unless it's for a session.  My family is way more important than my business and I need to remember to capture the everyday stuff that makes us who we are.  So I had the idea to capture "back to school" for almost 24 hours.  Starting with getting ready for bed the night before school started, until after they came home from school.  It was fun, but also kinda stressful remember to make sure I got photos of everything, LOL.  Anyways...taking more photos of our everyday life is something I want to work on more.

Bath time feeties!

reading time

Story time with daddy 

Sleepy Diva 

Love these little chicken legs!

confetti from Abby's teacher. Supposed to help not make them nervous or something?

In bed before 7!

Breakfast

A couple of months ago, I started teaching my little curly haired girl how to do her hair.

My mom wasn't really able to help me in this department...as I get my curly fro from my Dad.

I am hoping Abby understands it's a blessing to have a mom who went through a horrible awkward time in Jr high thanks to my crazy hair.  We are hoping to prevent this with my knowledge!

Love THIS.

Walking to school!

Last year we walked home from school as much as possible with the weather.

This year it will be even better since both girls go to the same school now.

We live about a 15 minute walk from the school.

She is so stinkin tiny still!

Mommy made a special treat for the girls before they got home from school.

They were slightly excited.

National Park Trip....aka pop-ups hate us

Sorry I have not been blogging lately.  I lost interest in my project 52 super quick this year.  Hoping next to year to figure out a photography project that holds my interest longer!  Things have been pretty crazy around here with the girls being out of school.  We somehow manage to be MORE busy during the summer than the school year...not sure how that works!

We just got back from an amazing family vacation visiting a couple of national parks: Glacier and Yellowstone National park.  We were gone for a total of one week between the two parks.  For those who do not know, Glacier National Park is located in North West Montana, and Yellowstone is located primarily Wyoming, but is also partially in Montana and Idaho as well.

We decided since we live up North (probably the only time we will ever be stationed anywhere near this area) that we need to take advantage of all that the North has to offer, which is why we have been doing lots of little mini trips.  We thought that a week long family vacation would finally work out this summer.  Most of the trip was amazing.  Glacier is the most beautiful place I have ever seen...and the kids loved yellowstone for all of the animals they got to see! The even got become double park rangers, and help feed some bears! It really made me miss the mountains and living in an area that has mountains, beautiful blue lakes, and lots of green trees!  We decided to use this trip as the chance to have our first big family camping trip as well. The two of us have realized that we both love camping and both did a lot of it before we got married, but not so much since we have been together...not sure why, but we realized we needed to change that.  But we thought with Glacier and Yellowstone both being "bear country" that we would feel a little safer if we combined tent camping and cabin/trailer and rented a pop up camper from the outdoor rec here on base.  So we got the towing package put on our van and hauled a pop up camper all the way to Glacier NP, and then to Yellowstone NP, and then back home...the van did great...for the most part.

Like I said, for the most part the trip was wonderful...except when it came to the camper.  Let me start off by saying that I LOVE camping, and I am in no way saying this was a horrible trip....in fact...the whole thing is funny, so I thought I would share some of the ridiculousness that we experienced involving this camper.    I love being outdoors, and sleeping outside.  I have NO problem with primitive camping...no electricity, running water, heat, etc.  But I was not expecting that sort of camping trip as our first time camping with the girls.  We found out right away that the popup camper had all sorts of "issues".  Our site at Glacier was a primitive site...no big deal, we have a camper that has propane heat, and a battery, and it was only for 3 nights.  Well right away we discovered that the propane system was not working correctly.  It was not producing heat, and the alarms for the propane kept going off, indicating there was some sort of leak.  We turn the non working propane off completely, and said alarm continues to go off.  This happens the entire 6 nights we have the camper.  Sometimes it stops, and then starts back up.  Sometimes it would go off in the middle of the night.  It was anyone's guess how or why.   Most places, no big deal...but when you are up north in the summer, it still gets to the low 30s and even upper 20s at night!  Luckily, this over prepared mama brought enough blankets to keep about a dozen people warm.  Next up...the battery.  This camper came with a good sized battery, which it's basic function was to power the lights.  The camper has 2 tiny dome lights, that are perfect size for the camper, but none the less, use hardly any wattage.  The battery lasts approx 2 hours worth of use.  So we have no lights for the next two nights at Glacier.  At this point, we have a tent on wheels because we have no battery power, no propane, and of course no electricity because we have a regular camp site.  As frusturating as all of this was, it wasn't a huge deal because this was only at night, and we were gone exploring the park all day.  But when it came time for us to sleep and the alarms wouldn't stop, we wanted to cry.  We had gone on a beautiful but vigorous 4 mile hike one day and came back exhausted (and I somehow managed to twist my knee the last couple of minutes coming off the hike and was in serious pain) and we just wanted all the beeping to stop.

After exploring as much of the park we could get to in 2 days, we packed up and moved onto Yellowstone. We had reserved a campsite a little ways from the park because everything IN the park was full.  We pull up to Buffalo (that is the name of the campground) It looks deserted and sort of run down.  We start driving through to find our site...which we find out is in the faaaaaarthest back loop possible, and our site is the farthest away site.  This is another primitive campground...no big deal, we just did it for 3 nights, 3 more isn't going to kill us (although at this point realize we wasted money on renting a popup when we could have just brought our own tent, which is actually larger and more spacious than the pop up).  Well when we find our campsite we both agreed it was NO GO.  First of all, it is still in "bear country" and there are warnings everywhere.  It is super far away from the ghetto looking "bathroom"...like a good 10 campsites away, which meant the girls couldn't go alone, which meant one of us had to take them, and the other had to stay back at the campsite...alone.  The site was also all grass, and it was backed up to a bug infested creek RIGHT behind our campsite.  We could see the bugs swarming when we pulled up.  To be honest, we were terrified.  It was the scariest, most creepy looking campsite either of us had ever seen.  We tried looking for camp host to talk to, but none were around, nor were there any sort of park rangers.  We hauled out of there and desperately tried to find a new campsite.  Everything we could find was either booked up, stupid high priced, or only one night available.  So, we decided to do something we never thought we would do...we started calling RV parks.  That's right, we rolled our teeny little pop up camper into an RV park.  We felt pretty lame, but we found a park that had a great price, full hook ups, a spot right near the bathrooms, clean showers, and we felt SAFE.  It was here that we found out...that we now had electrical issues as well.  We were super excited to plug the camper in, only to find out that alarms went off even more when we had electricity.  And, the battery that had died 3 days before...yeah that refused to charge back up.  So now we are at a fabulous little mom and pop RV site, paying for full hook ups...and we can not use any of them....BUT we are in good spirits because we have clean potties and showers.

By the last night of our trip...all we could do was joke about the specialness of all the things gone wrong...and every single one of them had to do with the camper.  We are pretty convinced the camper hated having us borrow it and was trying to make us take it back early or something.

Last but not least was when we were driving back onto base.  This has nothing to do with the camper being stupid now.....  But of course, we get tagged for a "random inspection" coming onto base...I mean, why wouldn't we?  So we drive away from the search pit, and as we are going through the line we here a BAM BAM BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM sound.  I right away assume that we had hit one of the barriers but Geoff said he was watching the mirrors and KNOWS we did not.  We jump out to look at the trailer and it had come off the hitch!  Apparently the pin broke, which dropped the trailer.  It was still attached thankfully because there are chains holding it on as well, but we were basically dragging the trailer.  We were stopped in the middle of everything.  Some nice airman came and helped us move the trailer out of the way while Geoff ran home and grabbed an extra pin.  This was all the maker of the pin's fault, who got an email from us asking how they would like to help pay for the damage the bumper of our car because of this.

All in all, the trip was amazing if you take out all of the fun times with the camper.  The good stuff definitely out weighs the bad stuff...but the camper did put a big damper and stress in the trip that could have been avoided.  Luckily, the girls really didn't notice any of this stuff going on.  Most of it happened at night after they had gone to bed and are pretty heavy sleepers.  They loved it, so I am thankful that we were able to keep a positive attitude and not ruin the trip for them.  I will be posting another blog soon with lots of photos about what all we did on the trip...I just thought I would post about the awesome camper experience we had  in the mean time :)

Here she is folks:

2012 | P52 | Working things out

P52 | TWENTY ONE

This week we are....

working things out.

Some days we love each other....

other days

....not so much.

About 30 minutes after this photo while getting ready for bed they wanted to kill each other.  Sisters.

Their emotions are everywhere these days and I know it is only going to get worse the older they get.

2012 | P52 | Getting older

P52 | Twenty

This week we are...

Getting older!

It's so hard to believe that this little peanut turned 5 this week!

Enjoy the many faces of Jordy!

2012 | P52 | Blooming

P52 | NINETEEN

This week we are....

blooming.

Every time I look at her

I see my first baby

and how she is growing up so fast

It seems like just yesterday I was holding all four pounds of her

Abby totally needed some blog love, so I decided this week needed to be all about my first born.

I can not get over how beautiful this girl is, inside and out.

She brings so much joy and love into our home.

The last couple of months she has started to seem so grown up to us.

She does so much more on her own and we are having a hard time giving her the independence she needs to discover who she is and who she wants to be.

With that, she is so much like her Mama:

She aims to please and to be the best.  She is competitive but still a good sport when she loses.

She does everything she can to make others feel included, wanted, and needed.

She has an amazing thirst to learn, and to learn quickly and as much as possible.

She is the teachers pet...the one asking for extra work because she finished her assignment before anyone else even got started.  

She gets bored easily because she wants to always be doing something.  

She will be outside if its possible. Cold, rain, hot, snow, warm....doesn't matter.

She is quiet and shy at times, but other times she couldn't be quiet to save her life.

She loves science. 

She loves the ocean...or any water for that matter.

She is totally scared to try new things, but still pushes herself to do it anyways.

I swear, this girl...she is my MINI ME!

2012 | P52 | Anticipating

P52 | EIGHTEEN

This week we are.....

anticipating

This week, Geoff came home with this.  Our EQUALS list.  The list that tells us all of the possibilities of where we are moving to in 15 months or less.  We were a little sad that some of the bases we were hoping for were no longer on our list of choices (Alaska, and 2 other Colorado bases).  But, we can't really complain, considering most of our friends that are stationed here with us, pretty much have a choice of 3-5 bases.  Geoff's job definitely has a good variety of places we can go...pretty much any area of the US, and quite a few places overseas.  For those wondering, our first choice is Buckley AFB in CO.  We have always loved the idea of going to Colorado because it seems like the type of area we would love.  Outdoors, mountains, snow, views, etc.    Our 2nd choice as of right now is actually to go back to Hawaii.  When we lived there 7 years ago, we never really got to enjoy the full experience of living in Hawaii.  We were newlyweds, brand new to the AF, and flat broke.  We totally took advantage of all the free stuff their is to do (hiking, surfing, going to the beach...a lot) but there is so much more.  Hawaii has an amazing SPACE A terminal (free military flights) and the only time we could take advantage of that was to go home (7-10 flights to Travis AFB per week so we went home a couple of times a year) even though there is flights pretty much all over the world that go in and out of Hawaii.  But, we just couldn't afford lodging anywhere.  On top of that, when we visited HI in Dec 2010, the girls just couldn't get enough of it.  They totally loved it.  We had a family meeting and discussed all of the different bases and what they have to offer, and all 4 of us had Hawaii and Colorado in our top 3 :)

2012 | P52 | Wondering

P 52 | SEVENTEEN

This week we are....

wondering (where our baby went???)

I totally did not mean to make Jordyn the subject of my Project 52 two weeks in a row, but it just sort of happened.  The other day I was all caught up with session editing, so I thought it would be a good idea to go ahead and do Jordyn's 5 year photos.  My schedule for May up until after the kids get out of school is CAA-RAAZZZY.  Jordyn had fun playing model, and of course getting a lollipop when she was done!

2012 | P52 | Sleepy

P 52 | SIXTEEN

This week we are...

Sleepy.

Oh Jordy....We decided about 2 months to finally drop Jordyn's naptime.  She still very much needed it most days.  Days she wouldn't nap after school, she was completely melting down by about 5pm...which is obviously too early to put her to bed.  But then her taking naps made her have problems going to sleep, even though she would be up from nap by 2:30, and wouldn't go to bed til 8pm.  She would be up til 11pm some nights saying she couldn't sleep.  When Carolyn was here she suggested we try not letting her take naps since she was here to help deal with the consequences if it didn't go well.  The first couple weeks were rough, we had to deal with a very cranky 4 year old every afternoon.  But, it slowly got better.  Some days you can see it in her eyes just how tired she is at dinner, but she fights it so hard.  The last couple of weeks her behavior starts to be...ummm, not to our standards.  So she will get sent to her room until she is ready to behave.  About half the time when I go into check on her a little bit later, I find her like this.  Passed out before bedtime (our girls bedtime is 8pm-ish, so this usually happens around 7pm).  She sleeps so much better at night not taking naps, but the poor thing is just exhausted at the beginning of the school week and then at the end.

2012 | P52 | Exploring

P52 | Fifteen

This week we are....

Exploring.

We just got back from a very fun filled family mini vacation a few days ago.  We decided since we had been to Minneapolis a few times, we wanted to go, but do some different stuff then just going to the Mall of America (which we still did, as well as Ikea, for stuff I needed!).  We checked out the new Sea Life park and a really awesome completely indoor park, as well as a few other things.  Overall the trip was awesome, and the girls were pretty much perfect during the whole trip, as usual :)

2012 | P52 | On our way

P52 | Fourteen

This week we are....

On our way!

Today we are on our way for our long weekend family vacation to Minneapolis, MN.  We have lots of fun stuff planned to do as a family!  I'll do a blog post next week of updates and then photos from our trip :)

2012 | P52 | Getting Answers

P52 | Thirteen

This week we are....

Getting Answers.

Ugh.  This photo pretty much sums up the last week or so in the VanDyck house.  Jordyn had a followup with her pediatric neurologist in Bismarck this week.  Not much new to report there.  Her medication was adjusted and she will go back in 6 months for another follow up as well as another sleep study (yay). Abby is getting seen in about a month for her MRI results follow up and if there is any new information we need to know.  Now for me.  Ever since late summer/early fall my asthma and allergies have been out of control.  In the fall I chalked it upto seasonal allergies. In the winter, I blamed the lack of winter and it not killing off all the spores like it should have.  Now, it is the beginning of spring and its getting worse and worse to where I am waking up in the middle of the night needing my rescue inhaler.  Finally got in to see a Dr today who gave me a whole new slew of meds to try and get it under control.  This isn't even everything, and is  in addition to what I already took for my allergies. (I would say this is maybe 1/3 of our families' RX's...I just snapped a shot of this while I was unloading my giant bag from the pharmacy and laughing at how ridiculous this was.)  Everything had to be upped.  Allergies being under better control will help my asthma meds work better to get my asthma back under control.

2012 | P52 | Taking it easy

P52 | Twelve

This week we are...

...taking it easy.

After a crazy busy weekend in California for my sisters wedding last weekend, this week flew by.  I am 2 days late on my project 52 this week, but I think I have a decent excuse.  I finally had my foot surgery to remove the foreign piece of glass from my foot from over a year ago!  That's right I have had some glass just chillin in my foot for the past year.  After it NOT working its way out like it should have, I finally saw a podiatrist who decided it should just be surgically removed.  It was a fairly minor surgery, but they did do it in an OR with me put under.  They cut a decent amount of the bottom of my foot to get it out, and its on the ball of my foot (where most of the weight is placed when you walk).  So now I am sporting an awesome walking boot :)  I go in tomorrow for my first post op appt, and then I will go back the next week to have my stitches removed and then I should be good to walk around normal.  Until then I am semi enjoying sitting around with my leg up....but it is pretty boring, and kind of hard for me to not do anything.